21:44 November 30th, 2016. This is the beginning of the third week of being off of Adderall. I must say that I have never gone this long before without it since I was first prescribed it.
In contrast to the image shown above, sleep is fucking awesome. I didn’t realize how much I missed getting a good night’s rest until I decided to quit Adderall. Now on those nights when I am able to get a solid 6 or 7 hours (or when the starts align, even 8 hours) of sleep I feel so refreshed. While taking Adderall I don’t recall getting much more than 4 or 5 hours of sleep a night, and that was if I even went to sleep at all.
I recall having countless nights where I was awake for more than 24 hours. Prior to taking Adderall if I stayed up for 24 hours then there would have been a good reason for it such as an emergency event, late-night party, etc. But with Adderall I stayed up late nearly every night. So many times I was awake during the late night and early morning hours while the rest of the world around me slept. I’m sure some of you can relate if you’ve taken Adderall.
On the topic of withdrawal symptoms I still feel a bit unfocused and off-track, so to speak. I don’t have any cravings for it. As in I don’t find myself thinking about getting Adderall or wishing that I had some to take. That part wasn’t too hard to get through. I credit my solid willpower and possibly how much I despise losing. I am an over-achiever and I hate to fucking lose at anything that I choose to apply myself to. To include kicking an Adderall habit. When I commit myself to doing something then I do it. Failure is not an option – although this may sound a bit cliché and overused, nothing could be closer to the truth in regards to my conquest to destroy my addiction to Adderall.
Yes, I miss having a sharp thought process, but I know I’ll get that back eventually. For the time being I need to keep pushing through the fog of Adderall withdrawal. If you are going through this or are even thinking about getting off Adderall then you need to commit yourself to doing it. I decided to create this website for that very reason. I’m too stubborn to fail. I love the feeling of winning and achieving goals. That is what drives me.
“Now a new look in my eyes my spirit rise
Forget the past
Present tense works and lasts
Got shit on
Pointed at by lesser men
New life in place of old life
Unscarred by trials“